E-nee-meanie-miney-moe

COLD HANDS?
Having cold hands is one thing but having a syndrome like Raynaud's is something else. This ad says it will warm up chronically cold hands and feet in minutes with a natural cream; let's hope your condition is helped. It says to rub this cream into your hands and feet and within 30 minutes you will feel precious heat coursing your fingers and toes to last for hours. It says it’s safe for diabetics. 4 ounces costs $40. It should be so simple.

CATARACT CARE

The ad says if you’ve been diagnosed with cataracts but your condition doesn’t warrant surgery yet, or if age is affecting the quality of your vision, this product can clearly make a difference, (no pun intended). This product effectively stimulates the eyes natural ability to temporarily relieve cloudy/blurry vision. It is also the advertised to take care excessive tearing, sensitivity to light, and the appearance of floaters. It goes on to say that it’s also great for improving poor night vision. We are to apply two or three drops, four or five times a day. Price of this product $20. We would be so busy putting drops in our eyes we would forget about how we were seeing!?

THROBBING SWOLLEN JOINTS
A formula to relieve throbbing swollen joints caused by gout. This is an all-natural remedy that brings immediate relief for red, stiff, inflamed joints in the toe, heal, and foot caused by gout and associated burning, itching, tingling, cramps, and shooting pain. It says to spray on affected area or into mouth. Cost of bottle $20. Yes, spray into mouth. It is a long way from my mouth to my toe. Is this a case of putting your foot in your mouth, you ask.

No, not at all, it isn't like asking a fat lady if she is pregnant followed by phrases to cover up the damage.

What I mean is...............

What I meant was.............

Let me put it another way...

What I'm saying is...............

What I'm trying to say is...

Don't get me wrong................

Please don't misunderstand...

Excuse me, if I said that I didn't really mean to............

Let me rephrase what I just said. ...........

ARTHRITIC HANDS FEEL NIMBLE
Make arthritic hands feel nimble again. Rub this product into your hands and you will feel the pain of arthritis, overwork, or fatigue began to fade away as the natural topical anesthetic analgesic, creates a warming sensation. The formula has remained unchanged for 121 years. Cost of 4 ounce bottle $15. Botanical: Capsicum annuum Family: Solanaceae (nightshade) Other common names: Cayenne, Red Pepper, Bell Pepper, Bird Pepper, African Bird Pepper, Chili Pepper Of course you won’t feel the pain; instead of pain in your hands will be numb ! Product like this available at drugstore with does not hint of it being pepper but is called Capsicum is priced at $12.00.

RESTLESS LEG SYNDROME
For many, the urge to move and constant uncomfortable sensations of RLS means another sleepless night. Get the rest you need by applying the soothingly cream before turning in. It’s clinically tested. It’s specially infused with vitamin E, lavender oil, minerals, central oils, and other, all of which combine to calm and relax your legs so you can finally get a restful nights sleep. Cost of 4 ounce jar $17.

ECZEMA OR PSORIASIS

For years people have been requesting a specific soap and cream, proclaiming them the best for relieving the itching and scaling associated with eczema, psoriasis, and minor skin irritations. Coal tar, an old time remedy, is the secret to its effectiveness. If you use just the soap or cream alone, you will see results, but when used together they are even more powerful! Soap is 3 ounces, cream is 3 ½ ounces. Together, they sell for $35.

E-nee-meanie-miney-moe

Grab that jar and let it flow!