Thursday, July 31, 2008

OLE AND LENA REVISITED

For Stanley K. Ranum
July 31, 1914-December 28, 1981
Love you Daddy



Ole: Vell, let me tink…dis is your birthday! Let me give you a little hug and vish you happy birtday!
Lena: Tank you, Ole! Yust tink, I am 66 today.
Ole: Ya, 66 and to tink day built a road and named it after you. Are you going to go to da park and haf your picture taken by da sign?
Lena: Ya, and I am going to vere my route 66 yeans.
Ole: Oh, did day name yeans after you too?
Lena: Ya, and a TV program too!
Ole: Did you get your free road map of dat highway, den?
Lena: Na, I vill do dat later. Maybe on the 20th of Yune. Vhat did you get me for my birtday?
Ole: Well, Lena, I thought about dat for a long time. I figured first you would want a big box of craft supplies. Den I thought about getting you a new set of dishes. Den I thought about getting you some more furniture for da living room. But, den, I figured dat you had all dat and what I thought you might really like is yust to reminisce about vhat you seen in da last nine years in dis place. Ya, dat, I tink is best. I vonted to make da fattest birthday card you ever got! So I figured, Vell, Lena, I tink it is time to vammoose from dis place. Vhat do you tink about dat? You vant to visit about vhat ve seen?
Lena: Vell, Ole, I tink you is right. I suppose it is time to hang up da lefse roller.
Ole: Yah, and ve gotta qvit maken da peanut butter, too.
Lena: Ya, I remember dat. You vas so silly to tink you could take da lid off da yar ven dat machine vas still running.
Ole: Nay, Lena, I took da lid off da yar ‘cause you vas stickin’ your nose in it.
Lena: Oh, Ole, dat vas so much fun.
Ole: Ya, and Lena, do you remember vhen ve went around da building counting all day stuff dat vas white?
Lena: Let me see now, vhat all did ve see?
Ole: Vell, most of da men and vomen had vhite hair except for vone or two dat dyed it black. And den, remember da vhite food?
Lena: Oh ya, I tought I vas going to have a hissy vhen day served dat vhite shicken wid da white gravy and da cauliflower and dat vhite bread von day all at da same time.
Ole: Vell, I figured it out. But I didn’t know vhat dat cold vhite stuff vas.
Lena: Oh, I know what dat vas, dat vas ice cream!
Ole: Ice cream?! NO VAY.
Lena: Ya, da served it cold because Mrs. Yohnson was complaining about it being to varm.
Ole: You don’t say. Mrs. Yohnson vasn’t complaining about da ice cream, she vas complaining about how hot the room vas.
Lena: Oh, you don’t say?
Ole: Vell, Lena, vhat else do you remember about dis place?
Lena: Vell, let me tink a little. I remember vhen Yanis made soup for supper and dat vas ven she had to make two salads and a dessert!
Ole: Oh you mean like red yello with bananas and green yello wid celery.
Lena: Honest to Pete, Ole…are you listening at all?
Ole: Ya. So tell me what you said.
Lena: Yanis didn’t give dem two kinds of yello. We had two kinds of salad and only von vas yello.
Ole: Do ve have dat straightened out, den?
Lena: Yah, I suppose ve do. Vat else do you remember?
Ole: Vell, I remember da days vhen da residents vere always vanting to make stuff to hang from da ceilings in da hall.
Lena: Yah, I remember dat. Do you remember dat lady who didn’t like to get her hands dirty so she had her care giver help her?
Ole: Oh yah, I remember her. Vasn’t she da one dat bought dem bells? Vhat happened to her?
Lena: Oh she died. Ya, her family did. Do you remember dat lady dat I bought all da underwear for?
Ole: No, I vouldn’t vant to tell you dat I remember such a ting.
Lena: Oh, dat’s right. I told you not to tink about dat. Vell, she vas a nice lady.
Ole: I remember dat lady dat you would bring da Flobee in and cut her hair in bed.
Lena: Oh ya! And den she and I vould walk around da building and everyone vould say hello to her.
Ole: Vhat happened to her?
Lena: Oh, she died.
Ole: Vhat about dat guy who also pulled da fire alarm. You know, da von dat tried to eat da Christmas balls ven ve put dem on da table for decorations.
Lena: OLE! Dat vas your brodder , Ole.
Ole: I haven’t seen him around here for a long time. Vhere is he?
Lena: Oh, he died.
Ole: I got von for ya.
Lena: Tell me, Ole.
Ole: Do you remember dat lady, dat Mrs. Anderson who used to come to shurch wid her dog and play da piano?
Lena: Who played da piano, da dog or da voman?
Ole: Da lady. She vas good.
Lena: Vhat happened to her anyway?
Ole: Oh, day moved avay.
Lena: Do you remember dat lady who used to volunteer and alvays brought banana bread for da last Vednesday of da month?
Ole: Oh ya, she volunteered her for about 20 years.
Lena: Oh my, dat is going vay back. Vhat happened to her?
Ole: Oh, she is still around. Sometimes she comes over to say hello.
Lena: Dat is good dat she does dat.
Ole: Ya. Dat is good.
Lena: Say, do you remember dat nurse…dat nice von?
Ole: Let me tink, you must mean dat von dat has been here for so long.
Lena: Ya, da von dat gives da good shots.
Ole: Ya, Ya, I remember her, she vas nice. Vhat happened to her, den?
Lena: Oh she is still around. But she sorta scared me because she vould put her hands on her hips like momma used to and dat means busssiness.
Ole: Vhat ever happened to dat cute nurses aid wid da big brown eyes.
Lena: HUMPF! You mean dat von you vas sveet on?
Ole: Ya, dat’s da von. Vhat happened to her?
Lena: Oh, she vent to school and got to be an RN. She is in Villmar now vorking at the mental hospital.
Ole: Oh she vas a cutie.
Lena: Ya, but vhat about dat Austin fella. Now dere’s a charmer for ya.
Ole: Okay you!
Lena: Who vas da first person you met vhen you came here?
Ole: Oh, I tink dat vould have to be dat Patty nurse over dere on nort.
Lena: Vell, is she here?
Ole: Ya, I tink dat Patty nurse vas doing some hugging classes wid da staff.
Lena: And she got paid for it too.
Ole: Now don’t go spreading rumors, Lena. Dat Patty nurse was trying to get everyone to understand how to take care of us folks.
Lena: Ya, you know she still is doin’ dat over dere.
Ole: Ya, it is good dey haf people like her.
Lena: Do you remember dat lady in da dining room who used to say, GIMME SOMETHING TO SUCK ON!
Ole: Ya, and day vould give her Yolly Ranchers.
Lena: Ya, and remember them funny tables people used to sit at?
Ole: Yah, day don’t have dem anymore.
Lena: Ya and dere used to be a rule dat you vas supposed to talk to the resident ven day vere eating, not to each other.
Ole: Ya, but dere lives were alvays more yuicy den hours. I picked up on some ‘moves’ listening to dem people talk.
Lena: Oh I remember some ting. I remember von time a nurse’s aide called in and said she couldn’t come to vork because her car vouldn’t start and all the time her car vas sitting in the parking lot!
Ole: Vasn’t dat some kind of a deal?
Lena: Do you remember dat time dat day got them two room mates dentures mixed up and day fit?
Ole: Ya and da two ladies laughed about it for veeks.
Lena: Dem two ladies lived in the same room but day called each other on da phone because von of dem vas hard of hearing. Vhat happened to dem?
Ole: Day died.
Lena: Oh, I see. Vell, it sure is nice to have our own phone. Dat vay we can call da office and tell da ladies to have someone bring us sugar for our coffee.
Ole: Ya, it is good day brought extra packages. Now I have about 10 pounds of little sacks in my pocket.
Lena: Ya, but day tink you are gaing weight, Ole.
Ole: Ya, watch dem get excited some morning vhen day weigh me in my pajamas!
Lena: Dat isn’t very nice, Ole.
Ole: I vant to see if day are noticing anyting, dat’s all.
Lena: Oh, do you remember vhen ve used to make dah birthday posters for the residents?
Ole: Oh ya, I remember, it vas always fun coming up wid some ting dat was what day did or liked.
Lena: Vhat happened to dat, Ole?
Ole: Vell, day decided it didn’t look good to have stuff like dat in da halls.
Lena: Ya, a shame.
Ole: But you know what is really good?
Lena: Vhat is dat, Ole?
Ole: Day still have the shurch services and da bingo.
Lena: Ya, ya.
Ole: So vhat do you tink about dat Kendra leaving to go to Eventide.
Lena: Vell, I suppose it is best for on the job training.
Ole: Vhat do you tink about her getting more an hour, dere?
Lena: Vell, I tink dat Kendra girl has a lot of stuff in her head and as more to give.
Ole: Ya, maybe she will come back someday and do another job.
Lena: Ya, maybe she vould like to do dat in the future.
Ole: Ya, and den dare is Yanis. You know Yanis has been here for nine years and she is leaving.
Lena: Ya. She’s da von who comes around and asks us to soup for supper.
Ole: Ya, she is da von who is always writing da names down.
Lena: Ya, and she is da von who always does all da baking and cooking.
Ole: Ya, can any von else cook or bake?
Lena: Not dat I know. You know she makes you wear dem funny hair nets.
Ole: Dems not hair nets, day is shower caps.
Lena: Vell, it really messes up my hair cause I sveat so from dem.
Ole: I suppose if she snuck into the kitchen and got some hair nets she vould be in trouble.
Lena: Ya. And she makes you vash your hands in alcohol, yes like you vas a doctor.
Ole: Ya.
Lena: I vonder if any von ever got sick eating her food.
Ole: Na.
Lena: Do you remember dat time ve vas painting and dat lady taught dat yellow sponge vas cake wid green frosting?
Ole: Oh ya, I remember dat and Yanis took it avay from her and dat other lady ran for help. And da nurse read the label and said it was okay.
Lena: Da nurse didn’t say it vas okay, she said the paint vasn’t toxic.
Ole: And den day got her all cleaned up and gave her another sponge and she did it again.
Lena: Ya, it vas so funny, I almost laughed.
Ole: Ya, and remember vhen day had da rule dat you had to vear leather shoes?
Lena: Ya, vhat was da deal about dat?
Ole: I don’t know, I am still figuring on dat von.
Lena: Oh do you remember vhen dat lady vas put out on the porch in the black pants and day forgot her and she got burned true her pants?
Ole: Oh ya, dat vas bad. I don’t think she goes out anymore.
Lena: Do you remember vhen da kids vould come and ve vould play parachute vid da rubber chicken?
Ole: Ya, I remember dat. Vhat happened to da rubber chicken.
Lena: Oh, it retired.
Ole: Vhat happened to the lady dat brought da kids?
Lena: Oh, she moved to Arizona so her husband could sell cars.
Ole: Ya, Ya. Day half to have cars in Arizona too, I suppose.
Lena: Ole, do you remember vhen we made dem patriotic flags out of dat activity person’s husband’s yeans?
Ole: Ya, da poor guy, his wife cutting off his pants like dat, oh for shame.
Lena: Do you remember getting in dat cold bus and going for a ride to look at the Christmas lights?
Ole: Ya, it vas cold but it vas colder going outside to watch them turn the lights on da building.
Lena: Ya. Remember vhen da halls veren’t carpeted and how fast ve could race our vheel chairs?
Ole: Ya, and I remember dat guy in da red scooter coming around da corners wid out lookin’ too.
Lena: Ya ya. What happened to dat guy?
Ole: Oh, he died.
Lena: His wife still lives here. She volunteered for Cat lick rosary.
Ole: Ya, dat is good. Is someone taking care of da fish?
Lena: Ya, day get fed and so do da birds.
Ole: Do you remember dat lady who used to come and help serve coffee?
Lena: Vell, which one?
Ole: Oh dat von wid da jewel name.
Lena: Garnet?
Ole: No, a white yewel.
Lena: Oh you mean Oyster? She is in da kitchen.
Ole: No, not Oyster, I mean Pearl.
Lena: Ya, I heard she was taking the summer off.
Ole: So what about the oyster in the kitchen.
Lena: Not Oyster, Oster.
Ole: Vell, what about her?
Lena: She is still here. I bet she has seen a lot of different things in the time she has been here.
Ole: Ya.
Lena: I heard dat lady in activities is retiring.
Ole: You don’t say.
Lena: Ya.
Ole: What is she going to do, sleep?
Lena: Why, is that what you would do?
Ole: You betcha.
Lena: Some say she is going to the lake to fish off a pontoon.
Ole: She seems more like a bass boat type to me.
Lena: Na, more like a little boat, little lake, little fish.
Ole: Did anyone ask her?
Lena: No, I just thought she vas dressed like a yypsy today.
Ole: Maybe that is what she is going to do…be a yypsy.
Lena: Fa la la la la, la, la, la, la.
Ole: Vhat is dat?
Lena: A yypsy’s life is free and gay!
Ole: Lena…
Lena: Yes, Ole?
Ole: Let’s go find some white food.
Lena: Angel food cake, den. It is my birthday you know!
Ole: Ya. You know, Lena, you haf made a big difference here.
Lena: Ya.

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